Oftentimes, when we like someone, we're quick to see all the good -- and many times, sweep any of the little "negatives" (which should be flags) under the rug. Instead, we'll indulge in the nice things like their looks or physical chemistry but brush aside the flags, such as the way they don't call when they say they will, seem to mooch off others or vanish and reappear in our lives... I mean, it's like throwing darts at a target and missing the bulls eye: MISS: A guy who has mommy issues... MISS: A guy... read more »
So you know when you're a kid and your mom tells you something is bad, like not looking both ways before you cross the street or playing too close to fire? And you remember and know the lesson but you can't help but be curious about how hot that fire is or think that it's lame to ALWAYS look both ways if no traffic is coming? Good advice. But do we always follow that in our dating lives? Well, let's think about. More often than we should, we accommodate the bad boys (this includes but is not limited to:... read more »
Note: A short while ago, I wrote a post about unfinished business with an old flame of sorts, Juan. We always seemed to play a game: we would be hot and heavy, cool off and then ice cold. We repeated this cycle twice before we went flat, likely due to the fact that he found someone else to strike his fancy. However, it seems like I went back down memory lane last night when he sent me a text message asking me to swing by his housewarming party this weekend. Now, given all of the drama and the little com... read more »
Dating is hard enough without factoring in the ever grueling weeding out process. You know what I'm talking about -- eliminating people because they don't offer some of the core traits that makes them viable dating options. And, after playing the field several times over, it's often natural to "shift directions" if you will, choosing to approach dating differently until something better comes along. A couple of very common by-products of unsuccessful dating includes: * Very jaded daters always expecting... read more »
When you're in the dating world, it's easy to be bogged down looking for all your dating requirements: height, looks, eyes, job, build, personality... And of course, age. Ideally, we all have an ideal age range that we'd like our mates to be. Some prefer slightly younger or same age, while others prefer just a touch older (say, 5 - 10 years). But what if the gap is a little larger? Then you have the making of a May-December romance, (May referencing a younger person in the "spring" of their lives and Dec... read more »
How honest would you want someone to be with you about what they want? Part of the problem in the dating world are the games we all play. You know what I'm talking about. Meeting someone, thinking you've forged a connection... And the anticipation after the encounter, wondering if you'll hear from them again, if they were into you... Only to be followed by intense disappointment when it didn't work out the way you wanted it to. Now, off the bat -- and forgive me for this -- this is something that mor... read more »
So as it is in the world of dating, the last few days have been a whirlwind and filled with stories. But, since I can only tell one at a time, I'll share this experience/encounter with you. Warning: Unlike many of my posts, the lesson here is not bundled neatly at the end of this post. Well, not quite. This post is much more for entertainment purposes. This past Saturday night, I was out for Marisol's birthday. If you've been reading past posts, you'll know she's a partner in crime and I find that m... read more »
A couple of months ago, I was in the wedding party for one of my best friends, Melissa. We've been close for about five years, so I was excited and looking forward to the event. While taking part in the weekend's festivities, I met her cousin, Jeremy, who caught my attention instantly. He has boyish good looks, he was witty, made me laugh and seemed to have it together. And, I was sprung and looked for any opportunity to find chemistry between us. Anyway, we clicked at the wedding, ended up grabbing a... read more »
It takes a lot of practice to just move on from someone when the relationship is over. But, admittedly, since I've become something of a serial dater I haven't had too much trouble in doing so, adopting the "plenty-of-fish-in-the-sea" attitude to dating.But to keep it real -- I have a thing for revisiting my past every once in a while. Essentially, I allow myself to indulge in "What If" fantasies about men I dated that somehow seem to move on and be blissfully happy with the woman that came right after m... read more »
This past weekend, when running to my brunch session with Marisol (which turned into its own session for Sunday's post), I was reminded of just how small the large city of Chicago is when I bumped into Eric, an old fling from a few years ago. Now, while I alluded to it in a past entry, I never went into much detail about him. Simply put: I took a random, physical event between two colleagues and made it the basis of a relationship that existed only in my mind. It hurts me to think I was this naive abo... read more »
